Monday, May 22, 2006
Magic
Have you watched Mastermind last Sunday? The one with Erik Mana. The one with magic. The one with all the people being amazed.
Well, I tried one trick featured within the show. The one about the 9 cards. It's as if he knew the 3rd card from the left that he wanted me to remember. Note that, it is only television that is linking us to each other. And well, for that matter, a TV and a copy of the tape of the feature/special. He was right about the card!
It's so funny how he did those things. He jut effortlessly did them. It's so abso-fucking-lutely amazing. Hehe. Do you think I'm fool? No. I was simply entertained. I liked how he worked his "magic". It all seemed so natural. It was all very entertaining, indeed.
But, I have doubts. Well, I always have doubts. I want to believe but there is still something in my mind that keeps me from believing. I don't know what, I just can't do it. Since I am the doubter, there are always questions! I always think that there's a part that's been edited or there's a pattern being a followed or something else that may be helpful to the perfect execution of the trick. In short, I am being cynical that's why I kept on finding holes in the feature.
But, you see, sometimes we are the ones digging the holes up, making us more puzzled and confused. We are forced to understand every reason for everything. But, then I thought, this thing is meant to be entertained. It shouldn't be speculated seriously. It is something in us. It is an unknown territory that even us can't explain or can't even understand. I mean, this is magic. It is innate. All you have to do is believe in it.
Maybe that's the secret of Magic. When people believe(sometimes, you believe it without noticing) in it, the trick may actually work. Thus, Magic.
april28 sensed inspiration at 11:56 PM.
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i love. i have loved. i will love.
Sunday, May 21, 2006
To Shutting Up and Choosing the Right Words
I will never be silenced.. I got this one out from an icon given by Sachee.
But, will there come a time that I will have to settle with being a little bit reserved and not "loud" about a certain topic?
There is always time for anything and everything..
Well, yes. From the stories that I have heard about that certain topic, I must shut up this time. It will be a big problem for me. I mean, shutting up. Well, but I have to! Or else I may be physically handicapped by the next time you see me. Am I exaggerating? Hehe. No, I am not kidding. I am dead serious.
Let's just say that shutting up and choosing the right words are the way to go. Well, at least that will work for me. I can be little Miss Play-it-safe at times. But, what's wrong with being a little careful(at times)? Would it make me a lesser person? No, I don't think so. So, I will play the part about this certain topic for a few months time. (Yes, I am talking months)
Other than that topic, I will be normal. I will be LOUD. I will be weird. I don't care anymore. Everything's contradicting when it comes to me.
Let us all be quiet and hope for the best...
april28 sensed inspiration at 2:31 PM.
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i love. i have loved. i will love.
Saturday, May 20, 2006
Backing Out
Erm, the storm is now over with a friend and clasmate.. I think.
But, wait, a new storm arises...
Surprise! Surprise!
Your words hit me as if I were its target. But, will it hurt me?! Well, sure. I don't know how to respond. You struck me and in turn, I become speechless.
I just turned the volume so loud, waiting until my ears bleed. I pretended as if you have just said something that didn't matter, something that is said over and over again. I turn to my notebook and pencil for refuge. For in them, I find solace and my own world. I drew my little characters again. I won't face the hurt anymore.
So, you may call me a coward for backing out on a self-waged war. But, if I face it again, I will just risk hurting a lot of people. I risk hurting the important people. So, I decided to back out, run away.
It is better this way.
april28 sensed inspiration at 10:29 PM.
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i love. i have loved. i will love.
Friday, May 19, 2006
A Bit More Appreciation
The past statements are too hard for me to handle. I really need to choose the right words next time. I make mistakes. That is what makes me real. But, I don't understand how the problem became a problem.
I started the drama because that is just me. This is me. So, shut up and listen to me for a bit. Don't let judgment fool you. It might bite you in the ass in the long run. If you just let me explain how I view things, you will understand. After all, you are intelligent.
You may see me as a push-over, I guess since I follow the rules way too much. I follow without question. They are rules after all. They are meant to be broken, as the saying goes. But, in my world, there are still some to be followed. But, delinquency is not an unknown word to me. I rebel and stand against the flow if I want to. I'd love the idea of being free and of being in control.
But, hey, I guess, I am too young to handle everything, right? I am inexperienced so now I am exposing everything to you. At least, I am being honest since I admit my mistakes and my weaknesses. Be thankful for that because it took me a geat deal of courage to damage my pride.
This following of rules. Where did it get me?! Do I have a medal right now? Do I have some sort of award for getting this far? The answer is no. No credit whatsoever. All I got was a diploma, some little-less-sincere congratulations, a total break from High School and this crummy english.
I always felt like nothing. As in empty and useless. Wala daw akong sinabi. That's what they all say. These people have no idea of what they are saying. But, I bear no grudge against them. After all, I am not impressing them by being me. I want to impress the people who feed me, nurture me, care for me. Those who really matter. I strive hard for these people.
So, why am I so affected? Because you said the magic words. And I feel really bad reading those. I am really touchy when it comes to these kind of stuff. Sorry for being so emotional. I really thought it was intended for me. I still don't really know if it is or if it is not.
Sorry, curiousity kills me and leaves me in pieces. I can't think straight. This is the only way I can deal with the stress. Sorry.
april28 sensed inspiration at 11:48 PM.
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i love. i have loved. i will love.
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Escapade
Last night, people of Roentgen planned a mini gathering since most of them will be going to Masci to get their yearbooks. Well, I was asked if I wanted to go. Of course I said yes. But, there is always the question of "fundage". Thankfully, this time, it didn't pose that big of a problem.
For always, I was late. Well, I do have a reason. There has been another electricity black-out at the time that I was supposed to be preparing. These black-outs can really get to your nerves. If you ask me, it did. But, thank God, power was restored at about 12:45. So, that leaves me 15 minutes to prepare for the 1 pm gathering.
I arrived at the school at about 1:30, I guess. They were not there! Thankfully, Carlo B. said that the Roentgen people went to Robinson's. They left a few seconds, minutes ago. So, I ran, mali, walked fast all the way to Robinson's. Luckily for me, I saw them just crossing the street to Robinson's.
People came at me as if it was the first time that we met ourselves for ten years. Aries kept on mutilating me{mutilating, hehe} by shaking me violently. Others kept on pinching my fat. Hehe. Weird people but they are fun so I am ok with everything they did to me. We went to Gbox, as usual. We sang a few songs. I think I sang most of the songs there. But, I am definitely no professional, skilled singer whatsoever. I do not have the "belter" voice. I just love to sing and I don't care what anybody thinks of me when the mic is in my hands. After the singing session, we decided to get our picture taken. But, at the last minute, we backed out since most of the people cannot stay for another one hour. With that, we parted ways. Some went home while our group decided to play DoTA.
YeAh! Score!
First, we sent Abram off then went to KFC to eat. Ade went home after this. Then, we went to the computer shop to play. PLAY! Our group comprised of me, Paulo, Aries, Gigay and Miking. Gigay and Miking went together to play as one since Gigay didn't want to play at that time. So, it was between our team{Miking and Gigay, April} and Paulo and ARies' team. It was a good game all in all but we decided to go home early since it's getting dark and it's getting late.
So, un, all in all, it was a fun day! I enjoyed the time being with them. I badly needed to see some of the people present there. And I am so glad that I had the chance to talk to them again since we are not going to the same school anymore. So, overall, it is a great day.
:D. But, there's still a part of me who wanted to play more..... DoTA. Hehe.
april28 sensed inspiration at 9:01 PM.
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i love. i have loved. i will love.
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Change
Just when you think you've got it, someone snatches it right before your own eyes.
This is the funny thing about that Everest Mountain Climbing Expedition thing. Grabe kasi ang GMA sa plugging. Ayun tuloy. But, someone told me that there is another Filipino team going up the Everest other than that of GMA's{the one with more publicity}. I really felt sad for the other mountain climber. I think he really expected that he will be the first one to go up there. If I am wrong, sorry. But, I also felt happy for the one who really got up there first. Congratulations to him! This is a first for our country. Who wouldn't be happy and proud?!
Talking about other stuff. I've really turned into an addict.. of all sorts. I super love my guitar now because I can do some of the chords with frets. I've also learned a few power chords from my 12 year-old nephew. I can do some new songs on my guitar. Cheers for me and my guitar. Back to addict mode agan, I super love Join the Club and Sandwich! You would really find me humming or singing their songs at any given time. It's so ironic since Sandwich's music is more lively than Join the Club's melancholy tunes. But, nonetheless, I love them both. Another fascinating discovery and new fancy, PBA. WHoa. I didn't really see this one coming. Love ko na ang Red Bull!!! Wah. Go Barakos! Ehehe.
Wui. I am really conceited right now so I am going to talk about myself again! Hey, this is my blog so it is ok. I've really noticed that have been this really strange, weird person these past weeks. It's as if I've morphed nto another kind of person. Fortunately, I've seen the brighter side of life. That's really weird since I've been always known as the pessimist, the "worrier" or whatever that has that negative effect. I've been more optimistic these days. It must be because I'm entering a new phase in my life. I'm really optimistic about all the stuff that is going to happen to me beginning June 13. Wah. Kaya ko to!
No more crying. It's time to smile away the problems and worries... for a change.
april28 sensed inspiration at 10:33 PM.
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i love. i have loved. i will love.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Another One
Erm, first of all, sorry for not posting for the past X days. I'm having trouble with my finances.
So, this week is hectic. Since monday, I was on the go. Well, I have to go back to the UPHS since well, I was ordered to go back by the freaky but GOOD nurse. Aun. Eversince that day, I went out of the house. Today is my enrollment. But, there was something that happened about noontime today that almost made me miss my enrollment and made me an OSY(read: Out of School Youth). Hehe. Whatever that is I won't divulge in here. Hehe. Isa lang ang masasabi ko about dun. You have to have a great deal of faith and hope to be able to overcome the problem.
Erm, Tomorrow, I will attend the orientation intended for my college. Wala lang. I may meet unexpected people over there so it is very exciting. Speaking of people, I met a lot of people in the enrollment. Very friendly creatures those people are. Excuse the grammar. Bout them again, I was really happy that they still remember me. Well, in the first place, I initiated almost all of the conversations that paved the way for us to be friends. I was really happy that we still know each other. And, thankful din pala. Since I know that in college, I am not alone. So, I'm going to see them all again tomorrow. Cheers for my new "friends".
This one is the part wherein you run for cover. Hehe. I am going to be weird again. Hehe. Bear with me please. Bear with HER.
Kilala mo ba si Pepeng Bulate? Matalino siya. Isang huwarang estudyante. Mahilig
sa math, english at science. Kakaiba siya. Pero, siya ay mabait. Mabait sa kapwa
niya. Gusto ko nga siya eh. Pero, merong nangyaring hindi inaasahan. Ang akala
kong android na si Pepeng Bulate ay natutong umibig. Nga lang, hindi sa akin.
Lumipas ang panahon na para bang isang kalendaryo na sa bawat bagong buwan ay
pinipilas. Gaya nun, unti-unti na ring nawawala ang mga nararamdaman ko
para kay Pepeng Bulate. I'll never get you getting over me ang drama ko.
Pero, naisip ko rin na aus lng un. Aus lng. Aus lng. Basta ang maganda,
magkaibigan kami. O un nga ba ang tema? Pero kahit na. Alam kong mabait si
Pepeng Bulate. Hindi siya gaya ng iba. Kaya naisip ko talaga na aus lng ang
lahat. Aus lang ang lahat. Sa tuwing iniisip ko ang sakit, isa lang ang naiicp
ko. Isa lang ang pumapasok sa isip ko. Ito yun. Para makalimutan ang lahat ng
pasakit at hinanakit. Isa lang. Ito...iyon... MAY GWAPO SA PHARMACY!!!
hehe. Aus ba?!
april28 sensed inspiration at 9:30 PM.
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i love. i have loved. i will love.
Thursday, May 04, 2006
Nothing Much to Say
Just for the sake of posting...
I really have nothing important to say. Hmmm.. wait, let me think first. Ahh.. now, I remember. Who would you pick, a girl who's commercial-model-pretty, sociable and visually appealing but she has this so-so personality and she can be quite useless at times or a girl who's not that bad-looking though quite plump but she has this "kalog" and cool personality? Sino nga ba?
Well, the thought came to mind ever since I watched Pinoy Big Brother Teen Edition. Who would I pick? Who I would I save? Well, my choice would be Olyn. Hehe. I like her. (Yung mga gusto si Niña, please control yourselves! Let me talk first!) I will always pick personality over the looks. Erm, I mean, both girls are pretty so I base my vote on the personality. For me, I like the one who is more outspoken and the one less stereotypical of the "teenage girl". I like the one with the stronger personality. Wala lang. I really go for people who have a say. Pero, I dunno, this is just my opinion.
Who cares, anyway?! Di ba?! Hehe..
Pero, forget the crap, go Olyn!
april28 sensed inspiration at 10:53 PM.
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i love. i have loved. i will love.
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
In the name of FUN.
Wow. It has been so long since I last posted. Well, hindi naman. Exxaj na ako. But, 3 days have passed! Yan. Exxaj n nmn.
Busy. Busy with what? With absolutely nothing. I just went to a bunch of places.
April 29: Laguna. It was saturday so my aunt was free from work. She promised me a trip to her former college, UP Los Banos ages ago. And this saturday was my lucky day. She took me there. This trip was not about me only. We also went there because it's the graduation. Some of my aunt's friends, roommates, churchmates etc grduated. So, there is more reason to the trip than I have thought. We arrived at the place at about 2. Traffic. As usual, there were a lot of people! I went to her graduation when I was 2nd year HS, I guess, so I wasn't that surprised with the bulk of people there. You know what's funny, I saw my former classmate, Miking(Gigay) there. He said it was her sister's graduation. It was so funny how we meet on the street. t was all a coincidence. Andame talagang tao and I'm bound to see someone I know from the crowd.
The graduation was the same old graduation. But, I have to bear in mind that this is UP. So, after the commencement exercises, there's a sort-of rally led by the students. Astig. It was all so dramatic when they sang the UP naming mahal song, and there were people with lighted candles and banners that say 'Oust GMA' or something to that effect. My Gosh. Astig. What I found also amusing about the graduation is their way of saying congratulations to the students. Some orgs will put up banners, have the balloon things with their graduate's name on it and some, while the name is being called, fired firecrackers. Parang new year at fiesta ung graduation. But, it is very fun being there and witnessing the whole event.
I met a lot of really cool and crazy people there. My aunt's friends are really like my friends. Crazy bunch, I daresay. Hehe. I was really fascinated with the honors received by some people. I really liked the idea and sound of the word "Cum Laude" after my name. Ui, nagpapahiwatig. Well, what can I say, I dream big.
ABout the campus trip. The whole school is for the environmentalists. Everything is so green. Wherever you look, you'll see green. My aunt said that the people there are also green-minded. Hehe. The campus is beautiful. It looks good. I love the space. I like it, generally. Clean and Green, un ang descrition. Too bad, I am not going there for college.
After the whole thing, there was a graduation feast. Then, we don't have any place to sleep to. Haha. Weird. Erm, thank God, there was a person named "Ate Lirs" who 'admitted' us in their room. Hehe. She's ok. I like her. She is my aunt's friend. She just graduated that day. Thank you, ate! After that, we went back to Manila. All sleepy, groggy and stuff.
I only had one day of rest fom the previous outing.
May 1: Pampanga. Huwaw. It was my cousin's birthday! Happy Bithday, Baby! (Pronounced as Bobby) And, well, there was, again, what I would call an impromptu party. With this case, it is swimming. Well, I woke up with someone asking me if I will go with them to the swimming. I was partially awake at that time but I wanted to go. Well, it is, after all, swimming. How could I say no! So, we went there. I could so feel the impromptu-ness of everything but I really wanted to swim. So, there I was riding on a truck, listening to mushy songs and playing "Spot the Baka! (Cow)" with my cousin. Hehe. The trip was fast regarding it was Pampanga. Well, thank you, NLEX! But, you sure know how to charge for your services!
The place was gorgeous. At first, it seemed like a junk shop since there were a lot of chop-chop pieces of machines in the front "porch". Haha. But, when we got inside, there was a mansion! t was so pretty. Gusto kong tumira dun! Complete with the pools and tiny cottages and beach stuff in the garden! Ang ganda.
The funny thing is I wanted to go swimming but I don't want to get sunburn and to get darker. I evaded the sun, most of the time. But, I swam beginning 3 pm up to forever. joke! I swam until the sun is completely gone. It was so cold when I got out of the water. So, I rushed into the bath room and well, bathed. We ate dinner afterwards and after a few games of "1,2,3... pass!", we went back home. It took us an hour again to go back. And, after that, I slept. :D.
Loads of stuff happened. It's cool since there was no work involved in them. It was all in the name of FUN.
april28 sensed inspiration at 4:02 PM.
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i love. i have loved. i will love.
